Two things stood out at this wedding. (Besides the love and that colouuuuuur palette) 16 years shooting weddings and this is rare to see.
The groom asked his SISTER to be in his wedding party. A girl?! Blasphemy. 😂
And the parties weren’t even equal. What?! Crazy.
This one hit home. One of my best friends didn’t ask me to be in his wedding party. Because I was a girl. “Not what you do.”
So seeing this now? Lovely.
Where does the “gendered, equal wedding party” thing even come from? Ancient Rome. Roman law required witnesses, and the party dressed alike to confuse evil spirits. Thousands of years later, we’re still doing it. Not because it means anything to you. Just because “that’s how it’s done.”
Your wedding happens once. ONCE. Blink and it’s gone.
So take it in. With the people you actually love (and trust).
Invite who YOU want. Wedding party who YOU want, if any. Celebrate how YOU want.
Too often I see couples pushed around by everyone else’s opinions.
“I have to ask her, she asked me first.”
“I have to have an all girls party.”
“I have to serve meat, I’m vegan, but people will complain.”
“I have to wear this, it means a lot to her and our culture.”
“I have to invite her, she’s friends with my mom.”
You don’t have to do anything.
Traditions. Gendered parties. “Sides.” Getting ready separately. Inviting people just because they invited you.
None of it is mandatory.
Let’s trade “BUT I HAVE TO” for “BUT I WANT TO.”
Part two coming, too many photos for one post 👀

some vendors

Hotel @hotelnelligan
Make Up Artist — Julia, Atelier Eva Blanca @atelierevablanca
Hair Stylist — Veronik, Atelier Eva Blanca @atelierevablanca
Stori Events, Wedding Coordinators @stori.events
DJ / Music — DJ Shane Oliveira @djshaneo
Florist / Decor — Atelier Carmel @ateliercarmel